A Funny Thing Happened On the Way

• If you’ve never been to Africa then it is truly hard to understand the hilarity that is a boda boda. Well sometimes hilarity sometime sheer terror. A boda boda is a motorcycle taxi or a in the more rural areas a bicycle taxi. Boda’s as we call them are used for marrying anything that can sit or be tied down. This includes people, as many as can fit, chickens, crates of pop, 15-20 mattresses a car hood or a guy sitting on the back holding a wooden dresser with a mirror. I am not exaggerating in the least. I have witnessed all this and more! The terror is that they have no care for their lives or those of their passengers. They drive on whichever side of the road will get them to their destination faster, they pass on whichever side of a car they are able and are generally a nuisance on the road.
  

• Not having a car means I do a lot of walking. It’s also a great form of exercise as anywhere I want to walk involves waling up and down hills. Several things occur when I am out walking. First, I get stared at like I am the first and only white person in the entire country. This of course is not the case, especially in Kampala, so I can’t figure out why the need to stare and shout Muzungu at me all the time. It is really funny when boda drivers or guys in cars turn to stare; I keep waiting for them to crash into something ahead while their heads are “Linda Blair’ed” behind them! The children shouting Muzungu is not as bad unless it is accompanied by, “Give me money,” which is upsetting but luckily doesn’t happen that often. What’s funny is that with adults, mostly men but sometimes women, it is, “Muzungu, how are you?” or with children it is, “Muzungu, bye” as you walk past them. Some of my favorites are, “Muzungu, I love You” or ,”Muzungu, will you marry me?” Once when a guy told me he loved me as I walked by, I turned around and jokingly said, “But you don’t even know me!” No response from him, but it sure made me feel good! The attention and inappropriate comments or noises can be difficult and I often want to yell and chastise them, but for the most part I find it extremely hilarious. The good thing is it in never done maliciously, but one does have to be careful how you respond. I choose humor instead of anger.

• The fun thing about walking all the time is you have time to look around and notice things. One of my favorite activities is to sign watch, to look at the names of the businesses, restaurants and schools that I pass. One of my absolute favorites is the 24 hour restaurant called I Feel Like Chicken Tonight (There was a commercial several years ago with the same jingle). Then there is the Disney Daycare and Psalm 23 Beauty Salon. Remind me again…what does Psalm 23 say about beauty? Recently I came across the Homely Café; I’m sure they meant Homey Café. It’s the use and combination of English words that make for some very interesting and downright funny signage around the country.

• When you walk you also see funny random things…like 20 or so cows – cows with very big horns – being walked down the road. But even funnier is the random cow walking unattended. You would think they would walk a little faster having gained their freedom.